One Hour 'til the Next Harvest

Ah, this is the life. Waking up at the crack of dawn for a quick breakfast before heading out to the fields. Spending the morning out under the sun, plowing your dirt and tossing your seeds. Milking the cows, then heading over to the chicken coup to check for a fresh batch of eggs. Waiting for approximately 4 hours to 4 days for your crop to be fully grown so you can go harvest your work and start all over again...

Ok, so maybe I don't know anything about real farming. And maybe it takes slightly longer than hours or days to return a good harvest. And maybe, just maybe, real farmers are more exhausted at the end of their day than I am at the end of my 10 minute FarmVille sessions throughout the day. But I have to say, the stress is getting to be unbearable. For crying out loud, strawberries only last 8 hours before they wither away!

Ok, for those of you that have not discovered the joys of FarmVille yet, I urge you to stop reading right here. You owe it to your families to not be sucked into this downward spiraling abyss that is country-living responsibility. For those of you that still doubt, here is my story:

The other night at work, I overheard two friends discussing this application on Facebook called FarmVille. One of the friends was going on and on about how ridiculous this game was, and how her husband is just obsessed with it. She started explaining the game, and telling all about how you have this virtual farm that you have to plow, then plant seeds, then wait hours for the seeds to grow, and how if you don't harvest within a certain time your plants will wither, etc. She kept stressing the fact the she just didn't see the appeal in this game, and how stupid it sounded. As I eavesdropped, I thought to myself "This...sounds...awesome!"

I more or less forgot all about the conversation until I was perusing another friend's page on Facebook a few days later, and there it was before me... a big giant turkey icon inviting me to check out FarmVille.

I clicked on it.

My life has not been the same since. I wake in the morning worrying that my crops have withered. I fall asleep at night wondering if I should get up to harvest just one more time before I turn in. I don't look at white picket fences the same way anymore, as I know now their full value (one little section costs as much as a dairy cow! who would have thought!?).

So, if any of my friends out there are wondering why they haven't heard from me or seen me in a while, now you know. I have taken up farming. And now I must be going, for my artichokes are 99% grown, and I need to harvest them while they're good and fresh.